What Am I Feeling?
Hello all, I've been following the forum for some time but in recent days, I feel it's finally time to speak up and ask questions.
I have always been an empath, deeply moved and effected by the world and people around me, but as of late I've been feeling it so much that my entire physical body hurts. I'm talking freezing cold but my armpits are sweating, neck pain so bad that I feel frozen.
I cannot for the life of me, shake the feeling of something very big that's about to happen. I'm not typically a paranoid person. I'm a libra for goodness sake. I enjoy balance and taking things in stride so that everything and everyone is calm. With that being said, Im ashamed to admit for the last 3 months, I've been secretly stashing away emergency water, food, asprin, etc because something in my gut says I need to prepare.
Why is this happening? Ive been told by a dear old friend that I have a gift but I have to learn to "open my mind and let what happens, happens." My father comes from a strong line of what he calls "Seers and Soothsayers" (new news to me) but...he feels nervous too. Our dreams are aligning, our worries have the same ending. How can I maintain openness and allow what will be, be with love and acceptance when I'm scared of what I see?
Have I completely gone off the edge or am I not alone here? I can't talk to many people about what I'm feeling because what if I'm wrong and I scare people I love?
The earth is out of balance, it's going to shake soon to recenter itself and many people will suffer. I have a feeling it will be a combination at once of government and earth. I have to get my family to the mountains when it does and grab anyone I see in need, on the way to safety.- Is this a mutual feeling? Blegh.. I feel weird and yucky "being open" sometimes. 🙁 I'd love some feedback...and maybe if I'm totally off, a go fund me page for a nice looney bin home. 😂
Hi Perriwinkle. If you're going to open up somewhere on the internet, then Jeanne's site is the place to do it; no trolls in this community of empaths.
Regarding the sensations you've been experiencing, I went through almost the same exact thing in the moths following the 2016 US elections. I was gripped by a feeling of dread I had never known before, and was cold all of the time. Whenever dusk started to fall I closed all of my blinds because I couldn't shake the feeling that some malevolent energy was watching me in the evening. I had lots of dark, vivid dreams and even started filling out an online form for obtaining a visa for living in New Zealand (yes, I had that urge to run to the hills as well.)
These sensations climaxed on the February 11, 2017 lunar eclipse then dropped off as I regained balance. So perhaps you're feeling the energy of this latest lunar eclipse? (what part of the world do you live in?) A number of complicated external events in my life conspired beginning on February 11th that helped me get back to an equilibrium, but I can say that one thing that helped was reading contemporary writers and philosophers who are trying to figure out a path for humanity as these roiling crises of "government and earth" converge. They allowed me to reorient myself and see a path forward after realizing that things are 100 more dire than I though they were, and I can give you a reading list if you wish.
Sorry I can't offer much in the way of centering exercises or meditation techniques to get you out of this tough patch; some more seasoned members here might have insight into that. Your friends advice to "let what happens, happen" is also a good guiding principle. As I mentioned, external events helped me past my own period disorientation, but those events were instigated by several decisions I made when I was in the grips of my confusion, and everything ended up working out.
I hope this makes sense? I guess I'm trying to say that you're not alone, and many of us here on this forum are in the same boat as you.
We had a topic going a couple of months ago about people feeling strange/negative sensations and trying to figure out if they were physically unwell or if they were sensing stuff from others. I will put a link to that at the end of this post because the advice in it may be helpful to you. As empaths, it is often difficult to separate what feelings and sensations are yours from what belongs to others. Being able to differentiate between those things and being able to separate from the negative stuff going on in others that you are picking up is central to your wellbeing. Over the last couple of years especially (since you know who was elected) every once in a while I get an overwhelming feeling of fear from the collective and then I know something important is coming. Sometimes just recognizing that some of the stuff that you are picking up on is not yours is helpful in coping. It takes practice, patience and conscious effort to work on this. I am also still learning about what works best for me I
Thank you for such insightful words. I almost felt like I could take a deep breath after reading this. Feeling as though I've found a tribe of like-minded kindred spirits. MUSIC. I love this idea and I will try it today. It eases my mind know that others are feeling physical pains as empaths and my heart goes out to you all.
Today is a better day. I have been focusing on meditating and letting go of what I cannot change, but putting love into the universe for whatever may come.
Last night, I took a long hot bath with some Frankincense. Closed my eyes and relaxed. About 5 minutes in, I had a sudden flash of white light, the number 23 and a vision of my dad looking...scared and shocked? White flash happened again and it shot me right out of the tub. I had to take a deep breath and let it go for a bit.
Its taking a lot to process being open. For so long I convinced myself that I was having irrational thoughts, or an overactive mind. I would beat myself up for years, even as a child. Realizing that these feelings and visions I have often become reality, is a little scary for newbies like myself. So I appreciate you all so much and the feedback you've given me. It wont be taken lightly. Much love!
Dear Perriwinkle 10, I had my flash of blinding white light and an accompanying sense of euphoria when I was 15 years old. I interpreted it as a vision of spirituality, a deep knowledge that we are not alone n this universe and that love is the most powerful energy of all. We are living through such a chaotic, depressing period right now that we become fearful. We are going to get through this. I know it in my very bones. Don’t be afraid.
I am fearful allot now days as well thinking I won't be here to see my little one grow up and make a difference in this world. He absolutely adores everyone. You aren't alone. I try to talk a walk and get some fresh air. I just hope everyday nothing catastrophic happens that kills allot of us.
normajean - yes, I have had this happen to me periodically over the years. I refer to it in Star Wars terms -- you "felt a disturbance in The Force." You may have sensed that something bad was happening somewhere not too far from you - maybe one of the recent mass shootings? Deep breaths, and May the Force Be With You!
Hi Ratbum. I always love your energy; it just made me think of the Innocence card from the Osho Zen: http://kathryn.mnsi.net/major/major.html#19_Innocence