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Empaths

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(@natalie)
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Joined: 7 years ago
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I grew up in hell and it made me very empathic. I hate seeing people or animals suffering - it just destroys me inside. I also seem to understand where people are coming from even if I disagree with them and be able to sympathize. 


   
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(@deetoo)
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I am a 19/20.  No wonder, in my advancing age, I am so exhausted.  ?  Like many of you, I’ve had a host of autoimmune disorders and other crazy ailments.  I have also dealt with periods of anxiety and depression most of my life.  And yet … like many of you, I am also quite resilient.  I used to often equate my physical and emotional challenges with being weak.  How wrong I was!  No matter how we’re feeling on any given day, we are all incredibly tough cookies --  some of us in the shape of snowflakes.  I got no problem with that.  I even find it funny now when some people underestimate me. 

About the 19/20 … I used to be more of a 13/20.  I’m wondering whether it was because I often dissociated during the first 45+ years of my life?    I understand that dissociation is usually connected with trauma.  That probably applies in my case, but I believe it’s only part of the story.  Since I am an empath, I wonder whether dissociation became my coping mechanism for sensory overload?   It just became easier to psychically “leave,” especially when I couldn’t physically remove myself from a person or situation.  It served me well, but it also came at a cost.  In later years as I worked more on eliminating the dissociation so I could become more present, I also became more in touch with my sensitivities – which is why I believe I am now a 19/20.   I’d be curious whether any of you have experienced the same thing.


   
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(@coyote)
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Posted by: @jeanne-mayell

For the first time I saw a future in which we had solved the climate problem. We'd done it with love.

Thank you for this, Jeanne. Joanna Macy and Charles Eisenstein have pointed out that the narrative of solving the climate crisis with a war mobilization similar to what the United States went through in the 1940s is doomed to failure because it comes from the same antagonistic mindset that landed us in the mess we're in. I also recently read a passage from a book by the healer Lewis Mehl-Madrona in which he recounts a a sweat lodge ceremony he conducted for a man who was "trying to pour all his energy out into the earth." Mehl-Madrona is told by his spirit guide:

"that the earth could take care of herself. She didn't need or want the man's energy, as she had the energy for him to help himself and others to heal humankind." 

So yes, I think that in order to solve the problem of anthropogenic warming we have to heal ourselves and abandon our destructive modes of thought. When that happens we will finally be conducting ourselves from a place of love.


   
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(@michele-b)
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@deetoo

"whether dissociation became my coping mechanism for sensory overload?"

Absolutely, for severe repeated experiences of trauma, such as repeated sexual abuse or incest, that  is the saving trugger from even worse pyschological damage or destruction with  dissociative identity disorder or borderline personality disorder.

In less severely traumatic but still overly painful repeated less often but still over childhood or over severely painful life experiences such as unhealthy or damaging relationships or emotionally or physically abusive marriages, traumatic car or airplane accidents, robberies or kidnappings, repeated pain, surgeries, illnesses, damaging personal relationships with others or sudden unexpected experiences with severe loss or grief, with love ones dying suddenly, dramatically or creating strings of further challenging life events, highly and emotionally sensitive empaths unknowingly seem to "take in" the shock and grief of other loved ones often believing we are helping or sparing them from pains and losses (especially our  loved ones such as our children) that we think are more than we, or they can bare.

It further traumatizes our own innate issues from other events or traumas in the process, in this lifetime or combined with patterns of "past" lives) though it can take decades of working through our own or others relational or even irrational behaviors and even co-dependant behaviors or the creation of often problematic coping skils to finally understand even the simplest of our own reactions, emotions or over reactions to even small but adding up events or experiences.

Some of us can tell the difference between ourselves and others in transactionally shared experiences, visions or co-sharing of emotions during psychic or communal events, but for those who haven't yet learned the difference between our feelings and the feeling of others, it is hugely somatically painful, disruptive and can be potentially damaging to the highly sensitive self.

But yes, pulling away emotionally from others, separating oneself from friends or family who psychically or emotionally are unhealthy for us, or just learning to retreat within one's self,  or one's own private world or space or places (people who live in the alter world of books, movies or tv for example) are actively but reactively created coping mechanisms.

It's why we can be extroverts on the outside but truly self protecting introverts on the inside, even hermits, or living almost lonely even monastic lives in religious communities or non-traditional group settings ir even within otherwise.seemingly traditional familial units by often separating ourselves (by necessity) from others.

 


   
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(@jovesta)
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Was anyone just drained today?  I felt sick without being sick.  What a tornado of exploding projectile nasty bad energy we have to witness!!


   
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(@michele-b)
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@Jovesta

I turned off the tv before D.T.was even done speaking.

It's not just him and how we are triggered emotionally. its all of it all happening at once to all of us in the world. 

The earthquakes are physical as well as emotional,  the volcanic eruptions, the collapsing glaciers and shelves of continental ice, the fires and flooding waters...all of it now..all of politics and anger and glee at others misery. 

When it gets to be too much, shut it down. Shut it off, do something good and caring for yourself and for others. Drink water, sage your house, take a bath or shower. Light candles, exorcise ghosts and demons. Go for a walk in nature. Then laugh at the absolute ridiculous of the things that the people who trigger our crazies ssy or do instead of going nuts or getting sick from the sheer exhaustion of negativity.

The energies are indeed intense. 

Big hug of understanding.


   
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(@jovesta)
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@michele-b-here-in-the-forum

Thank you Michele.  


   
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(@michele-b)
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Thank you Jovesta for accepting a long advice filled reply. You are most gracious.

Even if the person I'm replying too already knows how to get past negative or harmful to their sensitive energies (no matter what the cause but we all know yesterday was a bombardment for many here, seen or unseen) there are always guests or first visit readers needing suggestions and consideration.

Today's hearing and all of the accompanying energies may be even more intense for getting people irritated or even angry. 

Love you all. Take care of yourselves during these days and the many,many ahead of us!

@jovesta ?


   
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(@jovesta)
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@michele-b-here-in-the-forum

Michele, you are awesome!  Yes, I am new to the realization of how much of an empath I am.  Lately, I am burning my aromatherapy candles, massaging my feet, taking bike rides, etc...  to rejuvenate.  

 

as for current events, the energy is high and although the rollercoaster is crazy, I am more unsettled when I do not know what is happening, so for me it is a matter of tempering the negative energy of knowing what is going on with the reassuring energy of knowing what is going on.  

And on top of all this, I am going back onto Nutrisystem!!!!  hahaha!!!  no problem!!!!

 


   
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(@michele-b)
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@jovesta

New energies from the autumnal equinox and entering a transition period so why not rethink old patterns and try old but ever new to try again systems, patterns and ways?

After all with winter on it's way the energies will be calling us back into our cozy caves for a bit of rest and rejuvenation and we all need to be able to squeeze into our cave openings again and live off our previously stored supplies on our soft pethaps overly cuddly selves.

Best of luck with re-creating the new you!

?


   
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(@anita)
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One again, I’ve seen a psychic and been told I’m an empath. This affects me in

many ways, many times, esp. with crazy, mean, trump. The energy is tough to deal 

with and I’m glad I can escape to a room every night. 

But I have a big issue these days. My therapist has been going through a breakup and

I’m feeling her stuff so much. She’s grieving but thinks she’s fine. She keeps seeing this person as well, as friends. I think she may be fooling herself. I mean, I feel 

her pain and it is so tough for me to deal with my issues when I’m feeling hers!

She has said the best thing I can do for her is to be there as her client. But I keep wanting to give her space to talk. She does have a lot of good friends, but I can’t seem to shut off this need to be there for her. But I need help with my issues and I know I’m not helpful to her self esteem if I’m trying to be her therapist. Please help.

Thank you!

 

Anita


   
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(@bluebelle)
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@anita

Well, yowza.  This is complicated.  My pragmatic self focuses on the fact that you are paying for a therapist’s help with your own issues, but you’re wrapped up in helping her.  Frankly, I don’t see how this helps you deal with your own concerns.  You should see another therapist and offer support to current therapist as a friend.  

My empath self feels your conflict and emotional pain, but my pragmatic self is right. Your therapist should not be placing this burden on you, no matter how inadvertently.  I’m wishing you the best as you navigate the world as an intuitive and an empath.  You will sort this out and you will be okay.


   
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(@anita)
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@bluebelle

Thanks. But after 2 years and a lot of established trust, I don’t think I can start all over with someone else. That’s over a thousand hours of issues and connection.

Anita


   
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(@bluebelle)
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@anita

Wow.  I see.  I need not to be a pain in the ass.  It’s a daily struggle.


   
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(@anita)
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@bluebelle

You are not a pain in the ass???


   
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(@thebeast)
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Posts: 61
 

@anita

Beeing able to do her job properly will help her heal from her breakup . I don't think she thinks she is fine . She needs to keep her job separated from her personal issues . She needs a break from grief . And work provides that .

I think the best you can do is dive deep into the most difficult part of your therapy . It is time for family issues, abuse and relationships . Tell her about your pain . This will help her recover from hers . Not awkward, unwanted space and silence .

Sorry for my callousness . It is a difficult subject . I wish you luck .


   
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(@anita)
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@thebeast

Yes, she really needs to do her work. I have been thru trump, my sister voting for trump, my frustration with back pain, aging, religion, etc. of course I go over it over and over again. Maybe I need a big fat argument with my partner and worry about

death. Maybe I need to skip my anxiety and depression meds!

Anita


   
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