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(@deetoo)
Illustrious Member Moderator
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 2127
 

@elaineg, that's unbelievable!  It should have never reached that point.  Did those quacks not test his fasting glucose level, as well as his Ha1c?  Diabetes is one of the easiest diseases to diagnose.  

Hopefully the diabetes hasn't done any lasting damage, and your friend will begin to feel better soon.  He's very blessed to have you as a friend.


   
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(@deetoo)
Illustrious Member Moderator
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 2127
 

The Omega Institute for Holistic Studies is offering a free online seminar from 10/12 thru 10/20 on healing collective trauma.  Here is more info:

https://collectivetraumasummit.com/omega/


   
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(@deetoo)
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Joined: 5 years ago
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I want to thank everyone for their prayers and support for my friend, Patty, and her family.  She was the person who was ill with a rare form of adrenal cancer.   Patty passed away last night.  I strongly sense that she was at peace when she left us.  And after weeks of hot, muggy weather here, Patty transitioned on such a beautiful night -- clean, clear air, gorgeous crescent moon, stars and planets shining brightly.  That comforts me.


   
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 CC21
(@cc21)
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Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 713
 

@deetoo

I am so sorry for the loss of your friend, Patty. However, I am so happy to hear that you sensed her peace and that she transitioned on a beautiful, clear night. Peace to you and her family and may her memory be eternal.


   
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(@pacosurfer)
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Joined: 7 years ago
Posts: 136
 

@deetoo

I'm very sorry for your loss. I'm grateful that it was peaceful, and the weather was cool. May your memory of her bring you peace always.


   
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(@anita)
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Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 253
 

@deetoo

I’m very sorry about your loss, but for Patty to have gone so peacefully is a beautiful gift. I would love to pass with such peace. ?

 

Anita


   
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(@laynara)
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Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 176
 

Hey everyone its been a while I havent been myself mentally but today I feel like i have taken a step to better myself. I put in a application at a Animal Rescue to get me a new companion. I fell in love right as soon as I saw him.I hope we get accepted!


   
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(@pacosurfer)
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Joined: 7 years ago
Posts: 136
 

Oh wonderful! I hope you get him!


   
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(@michele-b)
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Joined: 7 years ago
Posts: 2159
 

@deetoo

Thank you for letting us all know. My heart goes out to her family. 

Bless you dear heart as you have so beautifully shared her transitional and now mystical new journey. Stay with her in your heart and help her and her family as they let go of her with one hand and help her cross theough the veil with the other 

Even the loss of a very ill loved one is filled with great challenges as hearts grieve 

Big big hug to you Dee for your caring heart.

?


   
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(@unk-p)
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Joined: 7 years ago
Posts: 1105
 

@deetoo

oh dang it, D.  It seems like it happened so fast.   I hope you are ok.   Please let us know if there is anything we can do, for you, or for her family.

Much love to you, my sister


   
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(@cindy)
Illustrious Member Registered Participant
Joined: 7 years ago
Posts: 615
 

So sorry Deetoo. Hugs. I'm glad you felt she was at peace. 

I didn't mean to make any of you uncomfortable when I wrote of my experience. I was also rather humbled with the responses. They kind of reinforced for me that I sometimes have a different slant or response to things in this world than others. I've told the story a few times, but other than telling the airline rep what happened at the time, I leave off the part where the woman in the mirror was old, and gray haired. I alter it to simply say I saw how haggard I looked. Most would not be welcoming of seeing someone other than their current self in a mirror. I know here it is safe to do so. Thank you for that. 

I have had a rough week, but it shows how difficult it is to deal with a failing narcissist (dad tried to punch me and threatened to knock mom down this week), so and the parallels to what we'll see in our current US government may make that better suited for the Situation for Rumpus Unraveling thread.  

Oh, and before I forget-on a lighter note: I do document such things for my own protection. When I texted my son about what dad had done, the conversation drifted. He is into video games and is trying to learn coding to make his own. He and a friend are coming up with a game, and he chose to have a fortune teller as a character. He complained to me that when he ordered a deck of Tarot, they didn't look right and he told me why. He had ordered the Rider Waite, and I had always used the Universal version. I found it funny, because even tho I needed new cards when he sent me a new deck as part of my Christmas gift, I don't use them often because the exact differences he pointed out sort of get in my way. What was a clincher for me was that he said it didn't make them 'feel' right. I've always told him he has a gift, and he's up to now refused to believe in such things. He wouldn't put me or anyone else down for believing, but he had always chosen not to. I couldn't resist the temptation and asked him to do a reading for me and my situation. He complied the next day. Again, he was using some guides to help in his interpretation, but said they didn't quite feel right, that he saw a few things differently in the cards, which matched what he already felt before doing the spread. I'm glad to say I think our kind has one more joining our ranks! Hope he has a better time learning to tune in than I've had. I still get flashes and dreams, and sometimes pick up something in meditation, but I've yet to be able to get things consistently or on demand. 


   
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(@bluebelle)
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Joined: 7 years ago
Posts: 1207
 

@deetoo

I'm so sorry for your loss and know your sense of her passing peacefully is true.  I'm glad her suffering is over and hope she will continue to touch your life in unexpected and meaningful ways.  May her light enter your heart and give you peace, too.  Much love to you, my friend.


   
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(@lovendures)
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Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 4476
 

@deetoo

I am sorry to hear about Patty.  Knowing your friend is at peace is a blessing.  I hope you feel peace and her love as well.


   
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(@triciact)
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Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 1222
 

@deetoo

I just now saw this post about your dear friend Patty. My heartfelt condolences and love to you and your/her family and friends. She has grace and spirit and I feel she will love her new existence of freedom and "lightness". For some reason I keep feeling she will be light (as in weight not just as in dark) I hear "light as a feather".  Sending you ❤️ 


   
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(@jeanne-mayell)
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Joined: 7 years ago
Posts: 7937
Topic starter  

Deetoo, You are such a force of love on this site. Your love for your dear friend shines through here too. I sense you helped her pass peacefully in ways you may not know but your empathic connection to her and the peace and clarity you sensed at the time of her passing tells me you participated  on this side of her journey to make it smooth.  How beautiful are you!


   
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(@laura-f)
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Joined: 7 years ago
Posts: 2137
 

@deetoo - sorry for your loss and for my late reply. How lucky your friend was to know you. May her memory be a blessing.


   
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(@deetoo)
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Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 2127
 

Thanks to all of you for your condolences and loving words of kindness and support.  A day or two after her passing, I thought of Patty, questioning why, at this remarkable  period of her life – fantastic new job with a big university in our area, happily remarried two years ago, two great kids recently graduating from college – why she received this death sentence?  She was diagnosed in March, and passed in early October.  In my sadness and at that moment, I felt Patty’s presence very strongly.  I greeted her, said a few words, and even smiled.  I felt her lightness and joy that some of you had commented on.  Patty stayed with me for a few minutes, and then went her merry way.

@jeanne-mayell, I was moved to tears when you said “I sense you helped her pass peacefully in ways you may not know…”.  I had lost contact with Patty for a few years, and a little over a year ago I felt this pressing need to contact her.  I couldn’t let it go.  I'm sure that my advancing age played a factor, thinking how time passes so quickly … and if you’ve got something to say to someone, say it now.  So I wrote Patty a long letter, specifically reminiscing about a three week trip we took together to Greece and Turkey, 34 years ago.  Back then I didn’t know what I was in for when I accepted her travel invitation, but considering how overly cautious I was at that time in my life, it was probably that bottle of wine we shared that made me say yes.  Patty was 24, headstrong, fearless, passionate, a bit wild and fully present; I was 33, unsteady, confused, in therapy, often dissociated and still healing from a long, emotionally abusive relationship.  Patty was open to everything life had to offer; in my case and at that time, fear seemed to rule my life.  On the surface, quite a mismatched pair.

I won’t go into the details of our trip – what happens in Greece, stays in Greece ? – but what I will say is virtually every new, exciting experience we encountered on our journey together was because Patty was so open to it.  Very little was planned – we pretty much winged it as we traveled from place to place.  Very out of character for me.   Patty helped open my eyes, challenged my thinking, and taught me to trust myself.  She did do a few outrageously “reckless” things -- without me! -- but survived the experience to tell the story, some of it quite funny.   Patty even gave me the courage to spend an extra week in Greece, traveling by myself.  Our three-week journey together changed me in significant ways.  Patty accepted me as I was, and helped me discover and embrace some of the best parts of myself. I don’t think she knew any of that, and I felt it important to write and tell her so.

Here is the amazing part of the story.  About two months ago, as she was battling this terminal illness, Patty brought up our trip.  She spoke about my letter, expressing genuine surprise that she helped me in any way.  Patty confessed that as she was recently tallying her defects of character, her inability to put others first stood out.  She believed that, back then, she was actually quite selfish, and felt remorseful. 

On the surface it may have appeared that way – Patty wanted what she wanted, and nothing was going to stop her.  That often made her a force to be reckoned with.  But the thing is, just being who she really was helped me discover who I really was. And I am so happy that I wrote and shared all of that with her.  Patty said she was consoled to learn that in our relationship, some good was there for me, and happy that she played a part in my journey of self-discovery.  And I am grateful that Patty could take that understanding with her, as she made that final transition.

Through Patty's illness and passing, I've learned how important it is to tell people how you feel about them, and what impact they’ve had on your life.   We also don’t know how we’ve impacted others; sometimes just a kind word, or a smile, makes all the difference in the world.  We all want to have lives that matter, yet sometimes we believe that unless it’s some big, bold action that changes the course of history, what we do doesn't matter.  It matters.  And what we’re all doing here, both inside and outside this wonderful community – our prayers, support, exchange of ideas, laughter, creative endeavors, caregiving, self care, social action – it all matters.   It all adds up.  Together we are making a difference.  And we will change this world for the better.

Thank you all, from the bottom of my heart, for being there for me.  You have no idea how much you have enlightened, supported, and sustained me during these past three  years.  And I love all of you.


   
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(@michele-b)
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Joined: 7 years ago
Posts: 2159
 

@deetoo

We love you too ?

What an awesome post to write about a dear friend found,lost,and found again. 

Your openings to each other through your letter and her response back to you is the miracle of healing wounds. Wounds not just in each of you but in friendships based on all of our perceptions, misunderstandings, and connections made or missed. And what amazing gifts you gave one another in rhis remarkable exchange. You gave so much to one another in so many ways and she passed with this healing,  thanking, caring energy exchanged before it happened. Neither of you missed your chance and that is so wonderful. 

That was a huge healing for each of you and the light and loving energies you are picking up now are such a lovely, lovely sign of a connection beyond death.

Bless you dear Dee for sharing with all of us. Tears to my eyes ?


   
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 PamP
(@pamp)
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Joined: 7 years ago
Posts: 270
 

@natalie

I am so sorry about your great-grandmother. I can tell how much you loved her. I was able able to know two of mine and a great-grandparent really holds a special place in hearts.

If people don't immediately cross over, sometimes a relative or friend who has will gently guide them across. I think my sister-in-law Joanne's mother did that when Joanne died suddenly. Don't be surprised if you get a message saying all in well now.

Sending love to you and yours.


   
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(@jeanne-mayell)
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Joined: 7 years ago
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Topic starter  
Posted by: @deetoo

We all want to have lives that matter, yet sometimes we believe that unless it’s some big, bold action that changes the course of history, what we do doesn't matter.  It matters. 

@deetoo, Thank you telling us about your beloved friend.  Your story, and her story, helps us all.  I especially am moved by Patty's youthful "selfishness" which, like you, I saw not as as a negative but as self revelation, as personal empowerment.  We women, and men with a strong inner feminine, can use more valuing of Self. We've been taught to take a back seat, that that is a more appropriate place for us. But we now must rise up because our receptive, caring maternal natures are desperately needed to save humanity.  To rise up, we need to value ourselves, not for what we do for others or how hard we work or only when we are perfect.  We need to know that we shine and we matter just because we are women (and men with that strong inner feminine--you know who you are). 

 


   
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