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@ratbum - such good advice you are receiving from the previous posts! Hang in there. Patience is what is so thin right now, but it is exactly what you need to keep having. Not what you want to hear, I know, but one thing at a time. And if you can, like others have said, create art for yourself. Use it as an outlet for your current pain (or as a meditative way to escape in the moment.) Sending you lots of love and patience as you work through this difficult time.
I have a couple quick requests for positive thoughts my way, if possible, to you all:
1. A friend of ours is really struggling right now. He suffers from depression and is also in an extended period of unemployment as well as some physical pain. He is in a difficult place and needs some good light and love coming his way, so if you can spare any, please send. His name is John.
2. My older daughter leaves on a school camping trip today! Some of you may remember our school struggles - we finally switched her this year. So it is a new school and they all go on a 4 day camping trip at the beginning of the year to bond, etc., and the teachers plan their classes based on how they all interact this week. She is looking forward to it, but nervous, and I am nervous for her! I am sure she will be fine, but this is a pretty intense way to jump into a new school! Please send whatever light and love you can for a smooth, safe trip, good times and good experience for all.
Thank you all very much!
Dear Ratbum, I want to wrap you in a blanket of love, hug you and tell you it will get better. I echo what everyone has said before. To be practical, looking for jobs outside of you field of expertise while waiting for the right opportunity is a good idea. You can use your skills through volunteer work, that would help others while keeping you whole since this gift is a part of you meant to be used. You would build a network in that field and who knows what could happen. Don't give up on your dream!
But more importantly, I would suggest to seek a professional who will help you see things clearly. I've done that on more than one occasion, and I've learned tools to help me deal with the difficult times through out my life. The one I use most often is the cognitive diary. You can find some apps on google play to help you with that. Instead of writing about what I live through, I draw the situation, it helps put things in perspective. It helps to see more clearly, and then you can see where to go from there. It could help you with your relationship with our mother as well.
I would also suggest for you to use your art to better appreciate and love yourself. You are surrounded by people who love you, but you need to love yourself even more. It would help you boost your self-confidence. You personal growth would come across during the interviews or while showing your art. Draw, paint, about you, your qualities, the journey you are going through, your personal growth.
Please don't give up! The world needs you! I used the Everyday Enchantment Tarot deck to draw a card for you: I scanned it because I feel the card says a lot through it details. I feel someone is saying welcome on board. The man's hand is reaching out to shake your hand. Good luck!
I send love and light to your friend. Depressions are not easy to go through but on the upside, we always come out of it stronger so please tell him not to give up!
I prayed for angels to accompany your daughter in this camping trip, to hold her hand to help her reach out to make new friends. I'm certain it will go well.
@cc21, your friend, John, has a lot on his plate -- depression + pain + job loss. I've been there a few times in my own life. And I know that one can exacerbate the other. I am sending John prayers of divine guidance, support and healing.
When I tune into your daughter, I see her smiling. I see angels alongside her, guiding her way She will be okay.
cc21, I hope you are doing well. I know you've had a few challenges this past year. Sending you light and blessings.
@ratbum, I agree with everything that has been said here -- volunteer, look for a job outside your field (it's only temporary), continue to create -- but above all, anything that gets you out and about, connecting with life. Sometimes seemingly ordinary experiences can actually hold some amazing, hidden gifts. Therapy is a great idea; it can help you step outside of yourself and see things more clearly and objectively. It's been a godsend many times in my long life. You may be feeling overwhelmed right now, but the universe is not against you. This too shall pass.
When I read you, I see you at a future place in time, looking back and saying "why did I worry so much? Look at where I am!" I've tuned into you a few times over the past two days, and what I keep getting is anticipatory excitement -- like things will eventually open up and the tide will turn. And don't forget about that wonderful Gene Wilder dream you shared under the "Dreams ..." thread. There's a lot of wisdom there.
Whatever you do, Ratbum, please take good care of yourself and remain hopeful. You are a much-needed gift to this world.
❤️ ❤️ ❤️
Thank you so very much. I appreciate the support you are sending and your reassuring words.
We are doing pretty well, thanks! Settling into the new school year for both kids and continuing to adjust to my mom's passing. I appreciate you asking and hope you are doing well, too.
You should not wait for the universe to do anything . This is your story. And life is much like a fairy tale, you shall not have your happy ending until you cross the forest and face your wolves . You don't want to lay down and wait for the goodies to fall on your lap from the sky . You are the hero . Rise and run to the mountain to face these fiery demons of yours . It won't be easy . It never is. It might seem impossible at times . But a broken sword or a poisonous arrow will always save the day . This is your story . Go grab your happy ending .
Hi all, not sure where to post this. I posted on 9/4/19, under Empath, a story about one of my dearest friends who died on 9/11/2004. This year, on 9/11/2019 another friend (1st cousin of one of my dearest friends) died suddenly. Mark was my age (59) and he just stopped breathing. They are doing an autopsy because they don't have a clue as to why. He was a gentle soul, quiet man. He baked the best brownies and brought them to all the parties... It's kinda strange this connection to 9/11. It's ironic that the date (9/11) is the same as "911" (help). Wonder if anyone picks up anything about Mark. I do not think it was drug related.
It has been a long time since I wrote here and a lot has happened in my personal life. I am struggling with Recovery from mental and physical illness. I have been diagnosed and am treating for underlying bipolar disorder. I find that I am more even and calm, but I do not dream like I used to since beginning to take the meds. I used to dream so hard with so many visions and colorful dreams that I would wake exhausted. yet I saw so many beautiful glimpses of the divine and departed loved ones.
I wonder if the bipolar disorder was tied to my psychic abilities. I find that I miss those dreams and visions. I also wonder how much of that ability was real or was it sometimes imagined. I saw my father's ghost but I was on the wrong meds before the bipolar was discovered and I may have been hallucinating.
While I do still feel some psychic ability, it is nowhere near what it was and I find that makes me sad. So I doubly appreciate the gifts you all bring.
My life is upended and I am starting over after a long time marriage. My child has rejected me in favor of her father. It is hard to stay positive , yet I must stay in the present moment even though I miss her and it hurts a lot if I am honest.
Although I am brave and strong, today I feel myself becoming depressed so I am reaching out here for two reasons...
1. I want to avoid isolating myself as it no longer serves me well
2. I truly need some inspiration and well wishes.
@ghandigirl Hang in there! With the accurate diagnosis and meds, you will be able to better care for yourself, your life and your mood will finally stabilise. With time you will be better rested, calmer and more balanced. This new well-being will be projected to the world, which will improve your relationships with the people you are close to. Take time to heal yourself and learn your new life.
Your psychic abilities are still very much there, alive and well. Because of the meds, your body is finally recovering and that's why you don't remember your dreams. With time and patience you will learn to access your psychic abilities and exploit them using a different process that will be healthier for you. Don't forget the meds affects your brain and your psychic abilities are also (partly) a function of your brain.
It will take time, so allow yourself to heal. I'm sorry things are not working out with your daughter. But don't give up. There is hope for you and your daughter to re-invent your relationship and with time it will be closer and stronger than before. This is a new life Ghandigirl. Look at this period as you would if you had physiotherapy after an accident. Don't give up, you are worth it! Love yourself because you are loved. I pray for you to have strength and support. I send you love and light.