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(@lovendures)
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Joined: 1 year ago
Posts: 435
06/29/2019 8:52 pm  

Pam, I am so very sorry.  As I was about to write this message, I saw a large heart pop in my mind.  I think I am supposed to tell you how much you are loved.  Lots of love.  I am sending you that vision of love.   May his memory be a blessing and may you find comfort and peace.  


thebeast, PamP, Jeanne Mayell and 1 people liked
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(@laura-f)
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Joined: 2 years ago
Posts: 601
06/29/2019 8:56 pm  

Pam - So sorry for your loss. May you know the peace of remembrance and love.


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 CC21
(@cc21)
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Joined: 2 years ago
Posts: 55
06/29/2019 9:00 pm  

I am so, so sorry for your sudden loss, Pam. Sending you strength and endurance to navigate this terrible time. Lots of love to you.

Laura F and Jaidy - so glad your surgeries went well. Sending continued healing to you both.


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(@anita)
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Joined: 2 years ago
Posts: 101
06/29/2019 9:25 pm  

What a nightmare! I’m so sorry, Pam. I can’t imagine such a loss! All I know is that it’s like being in the Twilight Zone for some time. One day, finally, you will feel a little better. Please keep friends/family nearby and perhaps find a therapist and/or group. Such a loss is such a shock to a person....

Anita


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(@bluebelle)
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Joined: 2 years ago
Posts: 278
06/29/2019 9:42 pm  

Dear Pam,  I am so deeply sorry for your loss.  Our lives are so very fragile and everything can change in an instant.  How precious are those days, weeks, months and years that you and your husband shared.  I imagine you must still be reeling from the shock of this sudden loss.  There’s no way to deal with this except slowly and one day at a time.  I am praying for you and that you be protected as you experience this time of grief and transition.  Be gentle with yourself.  Give yourself permission to grieve.  Treat yourself as you would treat your dearest, most treasured friend.  Remember all the time you and your husband shared and remember that with gratitude.  Gratitude will help you deal with loss.  Sending you much love and healing as you find your way on this new and unexpected path.  You will be okay.


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(@deetoo)
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Joined: 11 months ago
Posts: 359
06/29/2019 10:46 pm  

Pam,

There are no words for such an unimaginable loss. My prayers are with you in your time of grief.


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 PamP
(@pamp)
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Posts: 19
06/30/2019 10:46 am  

Thank you so much, Jeanne!


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 PamP
(@pamp)
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Posts: 19
06/30/2019 10:48 am  

Thanks Deetoo. For the first time in my life, I actually understand what being speechless is like. The words sometimes don't come.


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 PamP
(@pamp)
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Joined: 2 years ago
Posts: 19
06/30/2019 10:51 am  

Thank you BlueBelle! The 33 years we had together really give me strength and lots of happy memories.


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 PamP
(@pamp)
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Posts: 19
06/30/2019 10:52 am  

It's a stunning change to reality. I'm slowly navigating it.


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 PamP
(@pamp)
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Posts: 19
06/30/2019 10:52 am  

Thank you so much!


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(@michele-b-here-in-the-forum)
Joined: 2 years ago
Posts: 886
06/30/2019 9:54 pm  

Oh, dearest, dearest Pam!

There are many among us who know this intense and heart rending pain of the loss of a deeply loved one. 

It is a loss like no other, best understood by those of us who have faced and survived after many challenging pain filled years the enormity of a grieving process such as yours.

Among us are those who have lost spouses, partners, best friends, children and siblings that have created such pain in our physical and emotional hearts.   

There are many here now, who are facing the illness or potential loss of a beloved parent,  spouse,  a child or even deeply loved animal children who are already on your path with such inconsolable loss that they wonder if they can survive what you have already unbearably experienced. 

Our hearts and our arms reach out to hold you, to feel for you,  to join you in shared pain and grief. 

You are never alone. The hearts and lights of many are surrounding you, loving you, loving your dear husband. 

We feel his love around and in and a true part of you.  Now and forever more.

Please just know we love you without having met either of you because we know your pain and we know your deep, deep love and know his love and your love will someday be greater in their depths of meaning in a way that will bit by bit help to soften and ease this challenging, challenging time.

Love to you from all of us here.

💫💜💫 

Love, light, and healing prayers,
💜 MIchele


Jeanne Mayell, Bright Opal, thebeast and 3 people liked
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(@pacosurfer)
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Joined: 2 years ago
Posts: 104
06/30/2019 11:38 pm  

Dear Pam,

I'm very sorry for your loss of your Hank.

I ask that angels surround you at this time, and comfort you.


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(@polarberry)
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Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 113
07/01/2019 2:14 am  

Pam,  I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say.  I will pray for strength and healing and love for you.


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(@jeanne-mayell)
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Joined: 3 years ago
Posts: 2283
07/23/2019 4:41 pm  

I could use some support. Yesterday I took my perfect little three year old kitty to the vet because she had gotten so slammed by the weekend heat wave and wasn't recovering. 

I've known my vet for many years. She's always boosting me whenever I worry about my pets' ailments, telling me, "Oh this is nothing,  Jeanne!"  And all of my pets, lucky for me, have made it to old age. But yesterday she looked concerned, did a bunch of tests and came back shaking her head with the worst news.

Somehow when we first got this cat, she hadn't gotten tested for feline leukemia, which is like the AIDS virus for cats. It can be carried dormant until, Bam, the animal's immune system succumbs to something and they die.  She's an only kitty who stays indoors, so she had to have gotten it as a baby from her parents.  

I've had all kinds of pets over the years and loved them all.  But this one was a whole other level of adorable, beguiling, a talking little spirited creature who always had something to say to me in her funny feline way.  Plus I've been lucky that all of my pets made it to old age. This one was just three which is longest a feline leukemia-postive kitten usually lives. 

I sat with her much of the night last night, and again this morning, thinking about the Vet's advice, which was to end her suffering and absolutely put her down.  She was clearly struggling. 

I talked it over with the family and all were heartbroken but agreed what had to be done. This morning  I took her for the final time to the vet and then laid her to rest. 

I tried to distract myself by posting on the site, which works in one way because this community is so great,  but then I come back to thoughts of kitty.

I want to visualize her making her way over the rainbow bridge, but grief gets in the way right now and I just want to hold her.

 

 


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(@duncan)
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Joined: 4 months ago
Posts: 6
07/23/2019 4:57 pm  

I'm truly sorry for your loss!

She's adorable and looks like a little angel! I have two fur friends myself and they are a pleasure to have. It's amazing how much joy they can add to your life. At the same time, their loss is very painful. Know that you did all you could. I work at a vet part-time and we get a number of cats and kittens with feline leukemia and it can be a slow and painful transition. It is always hard and very painful to make that decision.  She found you knowing you would help her when she needed you. 


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(@jeanne-mayell)
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Joined: 3 years ago
Posts: 2283
07/23/2019 4:59 pm  

She found you knowing you would help her when she needed you. --Carol

Oh Carol, Thank you.  This is comfort I need. Thank you. I'm glad I posted. 


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(@perriwinkle10)
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Joined: 8 months ago
Posts: 60
07/23/2019 5:03 pm  

It's OK to feel grief. It means you loved her deeply...which means she knew it whole heartedly. ❤ 

I like to think our pets come back in different pets after they pass. There is probably a brand new companion in the making, right as we speak, ready to find her way back into your arms. 

Soul friends always have a way of finding their way back home. 


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(@deetoo)
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Joined: 11 months ago
Posts: 359
07/23/2019 5:16 pm  

Dearest Jeanne,

I am so sorry for your loss.  My heart softened and opened wide as I looked at her beautiful photo ... such a sweet, precious, and joyous soul.   I agree with Carol -- you were meant to travel this life road together.  

I know the loss of your sweet kitty is immeasurable. But so is the love left behind.

I'm sending you comfort, blessings, and lots of love.


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(@jeanne-mayell)
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Joined: 3 years ago
Posts: 2283
07/23/2019 5:36 pm  

So helpful. All of you.  Keeps my heart from closing from grief when I need to feel. 


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