Can you love Donald Trump and company? Do we need to love them in order to get a better world?
I have been thinking of you throughout the day. Relationships are so messy, family relationships can be really messy. I think many of us can relate on some level to the pain you are courageously addressing in your posts.
I think we not only have a right, but a responsibility to maintain healthy boundaries in our relationships. For me that means mutual respect and safety for starters. Not only physical safety, but emotional and spiritual safety as well. If someone I’m in a relationship refuses to maintain those boundaries, it’s a deal breaker for me. That includes family members. I love them enough to not tolerate ongoing unloving behavior that is present each time we have contact.
I hope that you will lean into the people who love you, respect you and value you.
Please know that we love and appreciate the beautiful woman that you are.
Your email came at a very good time. I’ve gotten depressed with the sudden change in weather and have been ill several days. I had therapy this morning and my own
self hatred came up. Of course, my sister issue as well. Maybe they are entailed somehow.
To know you were thinking of me at different times today warms my heart. Too often i
feel forgettable. That means so much to me. Your last sentence is a tough one for me to accept today, but it means so much to me.
thank you so very much.
Anita, if for whatever the reason you are unable to accept it, maybe you can close your eyes, take a nice deep breath and imagine it..you are loved!
Tonight I will imagine you surrounded by nothing but the presence of love.
i will try that. Thank you so much.
I live in a blue state but directly next door to a very hateful family (they have 4 boys and 1 girl who are all able to drive or drive dirt bikes). They purposely drive their dirt bikes next to our pool when we are outside just to annoy us. The "kids" are also now driving jeeps with "Trump 2020" flags waving on them. They are the absolute most obnoxious people and they mirror their "leader" in every way. My husband and I are looking for another home because we can't enjoy ourselves here any longer. I do "hate" them but I do not wish them harm nor am I even rude to them.
I "hate" DJT and the evil GOPers we have erasing abortion laws etc. I HATE what they have DONE to women, minorities etc. I hate their actions and don't wish them harm but HATE what they do and stand for. I couldn't be happier if the USA split into Blue and Red state America, fine by me because I've lost my zeal for thinking they will ever change (at least in my lifetime).
I am a believer in Christ and his teachings but I don't like to say I'm a "Christian" the way so many bible thumpers in this country do because they ring so false. Many people in this country go around claiming to be "Christian" but never apply his teachings to the way they live their life and act toward others. For me Christ always forgave and never judged and asked that we do the same. My aspiration is always to not be judgmental but to also be strong and have a backbone, just like Jesus did when he lost his temper in the church and overturned the tables.
I'm not sure hate or love are accurate terms to describe my feelings. I do not wish ill on the trump cult - I simply cannot want others to suffer. That said however I do not want them around me. It's harder than it looks as certain family members are either supporting trump (one step cousin is even running for mayor of a NJ town as a republican - on the anti facts ticket) or support other family members who do, and don't understand my instinctual and deep seated revulsion. I would be happy to never ever meet one of these people again - but then I ask myself how they became the way they are.
Several things stick out to me that seem to be true about all republican voting people I've ever met. They lack empathy for others - not even maliciously, it just doesn't occur to them to care about others. They like to bully others, if they can get away with it they will trample you. They like to judge people, and they have flexible standards for judgment that change with them - so hypocrites. They have a unique way of being able to explain away things like children in cages at the border as either not happening or somehow justified. So they are complicit. They have a unique ability to ignore uncomfortable facts or claim that those facts are fake and intended to slander their leader - they are a cult.
All of this also describes the Russian people I know that love Putin -it's the same mental gymnastics at play here. I'm guessing it's the same mental hallucination that all cult leaders invoke in their followers - its just tragic to see how much of humanity yearns for these figures.
I don't love or hate them - I try to have empathy for them and often fail, but I still try. I see them as a danger that needs to be contained and at best kept far away from me.